One Wife
In the Thorah [Hebrew Law], it does not specifically state that a
man should only have one wife. But a specific statement does not mean that it
is not there, just as the Tanak [Acronym for Hebrew
canon of Thorah, Nebiyiym
and Kethubiym (Law, Prophets and Writings)] does not
state that lesbianism is a sin. Does the fact that there is no specific law for
the female, as it does for the specific law against the act of homosexuality (a
man lying with a man as he would a woman) for the men, imply an acceptance of
lesbianism? No. YHWH did not give 613
commands to Yisrael, as the Yahudiym
[Jews] acknowledge. Yahusha` ben Nun [Joshua son of
Nun] did not write 613 commands on the plastered stones, when they crossed the Yarden [Jordan] River. A number of those 613,
are specifics to fill out the general that were given. This is a matter of True
Thorah, which Yahusha` [Jesus] spoke of.
An example
of this is the subject of divorce. Thorah eventually
said that a man may divorce his wife for a number of reasons, one of which is
for adultery. Yet, in the Testimony [NT], MaththiYahu
[Matthew] 19, we see a conversation between Yahusha` and the Pharushiym [Pharisees]. Testing him, they asked, " 'Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any
and every reason?' 'Haven't you read,' he replied, 'that at the beginning Elohiym "made them male and female," and said,
"For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to
his wife, and the two will become one flesh." So they are no longer two,
but one. Therefore what Elohiym has joined together,
let man not separate.'
'Why then,' they asked, 'did Mosheh command
that a man give his wife a certificate of divorce and send her away?' Yahusha`
replied, 'MOSHEH permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were
hard. But it was not this way in the beginning. I tell you that anyone who
divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, and marries another woman
commits adultery.' "
The
passage Yahusha` referred to is in Bereshiyth [Gen.]
This
passage from MaththiYahu is important on several
points. 1. Yahusha` is pointing out that
you can only divorce for adultery. 2. He
is pointing out that Mosheh added something to the Thorah that YHWH did not permit or it was added by others
who attribute it to Mosheh. 3. States what was from the beginning. 4. A man and woman become
Bereshiyth [Genesis] 2, we see the account of the ishshah
being built [banah] for Adam, because no suitable
helper was found for him. Elohiym puts Adam to sleep
and from his side, He takes flesh and bone and builds the woman. Verse 23,
"The man said, 'This one is bone from my bones
and flesh from my flesh; this one will be called ishshah
[wife, woman], because from iysh [husband, man] she
was taken.' 24, For
this reason an iysh leaves his father and mother, and
cleaves to his ishshah; and they become one
flesh." When a man and woman are
married, they come together, they become one flesh. That word one, is echad, which means one,
united. How can a man become one, with one woman and one, with another at the
same time? It is not possible.
Also, the
word used for built [banah], was not bara, to create (from
nothingness), or yatsar, to form (from what is
already created). The word here is built, used the same as when Noach built the ark. And, it did not say that a female was
built for Adam, but an ishshah, woman/wife, something
that he could become echad with. The ishshah was not created from nothingness, nor formed from
what already existed, as Adam had been created from the dust of the earth. YHWH
took what had been created, then formed and took a section [not one bone] of it
and built a wife.
Multiple
wives in Jewish history are rare and almost non-existent among those of
leadership, such as rabbis and kohaniym [priests].
The few times we see it in Scripture, are primarily of kings and rulers such as
Shlomoh [Solomon] and Dawiyd
( both of which broke the Thorah
in HaDebariym [Deuteronomy]
In Thorah, it is the wife’s marital right for sex. As with many subjects, if there was enough of
a problem with a certain set of circumstances, a law would be made for justice
in the matter. It must have been enough of a problem that wives were not
getting their conjugal rights, as well as food and clothing,
that a law had to be made. Shemoth [Exodus]
21:10, lists three things that a wife has a right to: food, clothing and
marital rights (sex). Which also brings us to I Corinthians 7, " ‘Now for the matters you wrote about: It is good for a man
not to marry. But since there is so much
immorality, each man should have his own WIFE, and
each woman her own HUSBAND. The husband
should fulfill his marital duty to his WIFE, and likewise the wife to her
husband. The wife's body does not belong
to her alone but also to her husband. In the same way, the husband's body does
not belong to him alone but also to his wife.
Do not deprive each other except by mutual consent and for a time, so
that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so that HaShatan will not tempt you because of your lack of
self-control. I say this as a
concession, not as a command. I wish
that all men were as I am. But each man has his own gift from elohiym; one has this gift, another has that. Now to the
unmarried and the widows I say: It is good for them to stay unmarried, as I am.
But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to
marry than to burn with passion. To the married I give this command (not I, but
YHWH): A wife must not separate from her husband. But if she does, she must remain unmarried or
else be reconciled to her husband. And a husband must not divorce his wife.’
"
In the first
verse, it should read, "Now for the matters you wrote about: It is good
for a person (man and a woman) not to touch as to kindle." This is a statement about unmarried people
touching in such a way as to arouse passion, mentioned also, in the sentence
about the widows, and then cause them to commit adultery. Not man as in male,
but man as in human being. Shaul states again in the Thorah,
the wife's right to marital sex, but also points out that a woman
should not deprive her husband. He points out that their bodies do not belong
to themselves alone, but to each other. This is not possible with multiple
wives. A man cannot be one, with his wife, belong to her alone and also another
wife. What if both or several wives wanted to be intimate with their husband at
the same time, or what if they wanted him to sleep with him ( I mean literally
sleep, side by side, in the same bed, not just sex)? How can a man meet the
marital rights and needs of two or more women at the same time and truly
fulfill them both/all. That is confusion
and YHWH is not the author of disorder/confusion.
The
passage in Ephesians 5:22-33, is even more clear on
the one wife to a husband theme. The
husband is supposed to love his wife (singular) as he loves himself, as Mashiyach (one husband) loves the assembly (one wife) and
gave himself for HER (singular-one), to make HER set-apart, cleansing HER by
the washing with water through the word. The writer does not say
"them", he says "her"-singular.
"However, each one of you must love his wife (just one) as he loves
himself, and the wife must respect her husband." A man cannot love his
wife in this manner and yet take another. It is as Yahusha` said in MaththiYahu [Matthew]
If a
husband took another wife, because he needed children, he is bypassing the
problem of barrenness. Barrenness or sterility is a sign of the curses of YHWH
listed in HaDebariym [Deuteronomy] 28, for disobedience.
So in a sense, a man is saying, "I don't need to worry whether I am
obedient to YHWH or not, or whether my wife is, I'll simply get another wife and have
children by her." Instead of taking his first wife before YHWH and coming
into right relationship, both for her and himself, he is trying to get around
the problem, without dealing with the cause.
A perfect
example of this is between Yitschaq [Isaac] and Yaaqob [Jacob]. It states in Bereshiyth
[Gen.] 25:21, " yitschaq prayed to
YHWH on behalf of his ishshah [wife], because she was
barren; and YHWH answered him and ribqah [rebekah], his ishshah
conceived." Here we see a
barren wife, but Yitschaq does not take another wife
and try to bypass that barrenness factor. He prays to YHWH who heals Ribqah and she conceives.
That is not the case of Yaaqob
[Jacob], with his barren wife Rachel. Bereshiyth
30:1-8, " now when rachel
saw that she bore yaaqob no children, she became
jealous of her sister; and she said to yaaqob, 'give
me children, or else i die.' 2 then the anger of yaaqob burned against rachel,
and he said, 'am i in the place of elohiym, who has withheld from you the fruit of the
womb?' 3 she said, 'here is bilhah my maid, go in to her that she may bear on my knees,
that through her i too may have
children.' 4 so she gave him bilhah her maid as an ishshah,
and yaaqob went in to her. 5 bilhah
conceived and bore yaaqob a son. 6 then rachel said, 'elohiym has
vindicated me, and has indeed heard my voice and has given me a son.' therefore
she named him dan.
7 bilhah, the maid of rachel conceived again and bore yaaqob a second son.
8 so rachel
said, 'with mighty wrestlings i
have wrestled with my sister, and i have indeed
prevailed.' and she named him nafthaliy.”
This
passage does not state that Yaaqob prayed for Rachel
and she was healed, as Yitschaq had done. It states
that he was angry and Rachel decides to bypass the barrenness, which she views
as a competition with her sister Leah, who has borne children for Yaaqob. Rachel then gives her maidservant Bilhah to Yaaqob, as a means of
procuring children. The phrase, " that she may bear on my knees", is common among Middle Eastern practices. The barren woman would have the
pregnant woman, sit on her knees while giving birth,
to symbolically have the child pass between her knees, therefore counting it as
hers.
Rachel,
after having two children through Bilhah, still is
not content. She viewed it as a disgrace for her, to not be able to have
children naturally for Yaaqob. She is still trying to
bypass YHWH. Further in chapter 30, we read, "14 now in the days of wheat harvest rueben
[firstborn of yaaqob’s wife leah]
went and found mandrakes in the field, and brought them to leah
his mother. then rachel said
to leah, 'please give me some of the mandrakes of
your son.' 15 but she said to
her, 'is it a small matter for you to take my iysh
[husband]? and would you take the mandrakes of my son
also?' so rachel said, 'therefore he may lie with you tonight in
return for the mandrakes of your son.' 16
when yaaqob came in from the field in the evening,
then leah went out to meet
him and said, 'you must come in to me, for i have
surely hired you with the mandrakes of my son'.
so he lay with her that night. 17 elohiym gave heed to leah,
and she conceived and bore yaaqob a fifth son. 18
then leah said, 'elohiym has given me my wages because i
gave my maid to my iysh.' so she named him yishshkar. 19
leah conceived again and
bore a sixth son to yaaqob. 20 then leah said, 'elohiym has
endowed me with a good gift; now my iysh [husband]
will dwell with me, because i have borne him six
sons.' so she named him zebulun. 21 afterward she bore a daughter
and named her diynah.
22 then elohiym remembered rachel, and elohiym
gave heed to her and opened her womb. 23
so she conceived and bore a son and said, 'elohiym
has taken away my reproach.' 24
she named him yahusef, saying, 'may YHWH give me
another son.'
Mandrakes
were, and are still, reputed to heal barrenness. This is why Rachel wanted them
so badly and was willing to allow Leah to hire Yaaqob
for a night. Later when Yaaqob takes his wives and
children and flees his father in law Laban, Rachel
steals one of his idols and they are pursued to get the idol back. What is
missed in the English translations is that this idol is a terafiym
– a healing idol. The selling of Yaaqob for a
mandrake shows that she is still seeking healing from anything other than YHWH.
This brings up several points. If Leah was having her needs met as a wife, then
why did she have to hire Yaaqob, to sleep with
her? Why was Yaaqob
going directly to Rachel and had to be diverted by Leah, who pointed out that he had been hired by her? And why was Yaaqob not consulted, but rather the dominant wife giving
the conditions of the transaction? Why was Rachel still trying something other
than YHWH, to have children?
Another
example of barrenness is that of Abraham and his ishshah
Sarah. In this case, YHWH makes a promise to Abraham, in Bereshiyth
[Gen.] 15:1, that He will increase Abraham greatly. Abraham points out that he
is childless. YHWH then tells Abraham that he will have one, naturally, that
will be his heir and that his seed will be as the stars. In chapter 16, we see
that Saray was barren and she decides to give her
maidservant, Hagar, to Abraham to have children through her. Abraham took Hagar
and lies with her and she conceives. Perhaps, Abraham was rationalizing what
YHWH promised, thinking that since YHWH said he would produce an heir
naturally, that that might not mean that it was through Saray.
Yet Yishmael was not the heir that YHWH foretold, Yitschaq, through Sarah, was.
In chapter
17, you see YHWH make a beriyth with Abram, changing
his name to Abraham. YHWH also changes the name of Saray
to Sarah and foretells that she will have a son, and that his name will be Yitschaq [Isaac]. YHWH explains that Yishmael
[Ishmael] will be blessed, but that the beriyth is
with the seed of Yitschaq. Had they waited for the
word of YHWH to come to pass, it would have prevented the nation struggles that
have constantly occurred, as well as the
lack of shalom that was encountered until Abraham sent Hagar and Yishmael away, as a result of a bad decision.
I am not
saying, that the taking of these other women for the purpose of having
children, is sin. The Scripture does not state it as such, but I do view it as
not being the best of YHWH, the True Thorah, as
Yahusha pointed out in the case of divorce and what was from the beginning.
That the best of YHWH is for the healing of the ishshah
to bear children, not the taking of a substitute, that in all cases recorded,
caused strife, and not shalom. The fruit of those incidents,
was not good.
Now lets look at the application of a verse in the New Testament
book of MaththiYahu [Matthew]. In Chapter 12, verse
25, we see a situation where Yahusha healed a man who was blind and mute and
the Farushiym [Pharisees] say that he has done this
by Baal Zebub, the Prince of Demons. “Yahusha knew
their thoughts and said to them, ‘All kingdoms divided against itself will be destroyed; and all houses and cities which
are divided will not stand.’ “This word divide, in the Peshitta
[Aramaic version of the Greek New Testament], is feleg,
and means divide, cleave, split. There is a man in the Tanak
[OT], Bereshiyth [Genesis]
In the
relationship with YHWH, does He allow you to love Him, yet love another deity?
Does YHWH not say that He is a zealous/jealous El, not desiring to share
intimacy in this relationship with Him? Shemoth 20:3-5, “ ‘3 you will have no other elohiym before my face.
4 you will not make for yourself an idol, or any likeness of
what is in the heavens above or on the earth beneath or in the water under the
earth. 5 you will not worship
them or serve them; for i am YHWH your elohey,
a jealous el,’ “ To seek after another deity is
adultery against YHWH. He desires us to be intimate with Him alone. A classic
example is that of EliYahu [Elijah] with the prophets
of Baal. He asked in I Melekiym [Kings]
The subject of single mindedness is a subject all on its own
and bears much in this relationship with YHWH, as does the study of adultery
and idolatry. Adultery is basically this – when you sleep with a woman you are
then married [look it up in the Tanak people]. If a
man or woman then sleeps with another, it becomes adultery. There is no concept
of fornication, meaning premarital sex, in the Tanak.
That is a Greek concept and word that has no foundation in the Tanak. English translators have muddied these subjects by
inconsistently translating words, whether out of ignorance or design to keep
people from following Thorah and live a life of deceptive
grace.
When Yahusha was addressing the subject of adultery,
speaking to the people about True Thorah at the sermon on the mount in MaththiYahu
[Matthew 5], he is talking about matters of the heart, taking it up a notch
from what is written to what YHWH truly desires. MaththiYahu
5:27-30, “
‘You have heard that it was said, “You will not commit adultery.” But I say to
you, that every one who looks on a woman so as that he will desire her, already
commits adultery in his heart. But if your right eye causes you to offend, root
it out and cast it from you. It is better for you that one of your members
should perish, than that your whole body should fall into Gehenna
[hell]. And if your right hand causes you to offend, cut it off and cast it
from you; for it is better for you that one from your members should perish,
rather than your whole body should fall into Gehenna.’
“
This view of Yahusha’s bears witness to the study of
adultery and idolatry in the Tanak [OT]. I do not
feel that you can separate the subjects of multiple wives from those of
adultery and divorce. What man, who has a heart to follow the ways of YHWH,
would not want that same oneness with his wife that YHWH desires in the
relationship with us and guard it jealously? What was taught in the beginning?
What is True Thorah on this subject? Bereshiyth [Genesis]
Kathryn
QannaYahu